Sunday, December 19, 2010

i don't


never have.

Things were much easier when I didn't try.

But it seems I have to, because I can't leave this alone, it'll just...niggle at me, on and on and on and all the what if's won't leave me alone, they'll keep me up at night staring at the glow in the dark stars on my ceiling with your words circling through my head over and over again

i need some tea and some time to think.


  1. Vivi, I'm so sorry.
    It's my fault all of this started.

    I know I have no right to keep speaking on this matter.

    Honestly, I feel like you and Chester would beat me half to death when you saw me, but I have to say this much.

    It's Chester.
    The friend you saw run.
    The friend who survived.
    And the friend who came to you in your time of need.

    And well, if the guy has any sense of decency.

    (Which I'm sure he does.)

    He should comment right after me and say a whole slew of heartfelt romantic things.

    After you feel better, of course.

    Please don't beat me with a cricket bat.

  2. Vieve-

    I'm not going to do what Jeff said I should do, because it'll just make you uncomfortable and stressed and you will probably go and do something reckless to blow off steam. So I won't.

    I'll call you tomorrow morning, check if you're okay. We can talk then, if that's okay with you. I'll take incoherent screaming and/or expletives as a "no".


  3. @Jeff: Nah bro, you meant well.

    @Chester: go play in traffic, I still have work. Call tonight. I'd sleep better if we sorted this out sooner.

  4. That sounds a bit more like the Vivi we know and love.

  5. She must have seeked council with the Almighty Lamp Santa.

    Lol. Lamp Santa.


  6. *counsel, Jeff.

    Lamp Santa could survive dividing by Zero.


  7. Who says there isn't a Council of Lamp Santas?

    And yes, this is to make up for my poor spelling.

    Lamp Santa has spoken!


  8. Nice save, Jeff. Nice save.


  9. Cheer up, Vivi. I flipped him off while Jean and her friend drove me to her place (it's nice, cozy, and I have a ready supply of cuddling, by the by).

  10. I don't need cheering up. I'm fine. Just...confused.

  11. To quote a line from CSI: Las Vegas:
    "Confused is the best place for a person to be."

  12. Well, at least I'm thinking about these things now instead of shoving them to the back of my mind.

  13. -nods- Running has given me a lot of time to get my head sorted out and think things through, and I think I've gotten myself sorted out so I can hit the ground running rather than stumble around and faceplant. So, use the time to think and keep yourself out of trouble, Vivi.

  14. Unfortunately, for all my resourcefulness, when it comes to boys I fail epically.

  15. Vivi, you're a badass girl with a heart of gold.

    Just do what you do best.


  16. Unfortunately, Jeff, what I do best is be totally and brutally honest, and with all that honesty all I can say is I have no idea what's going on.

  17. Just answer this question in the way you answer all of your statements.

    How do you feel about Chester?

    Then you've set your course.


  18. He's been my friend since Year 11,(5th Form, or Sophomore year to you Americans) he's a joker, acts all stupid, but he's as reliable as they come and you can always trust him to watch your back, no matter what. I don't think I've ever known him to break a promise or to make one he can't keep. I trust him as much as I do my family, or my best friend.

  19. Uh huh.
    And, has anything about him caught your eye?

    Has he always been there for you?

    Have you been jealous about who hangs out with him?

    Especially other women?

    Let's see how far this gets.


  20. He's...not bad looking, I guess.

    He's just always sort of around. if I need to sound off at someone he's usually there and he almost always answers his phone. Even if he's at the movies his phone will be on silent.

    I've never really been jealous. Like I think he's said, he's not good with girls. Back in high school we used to have long bitch-sessions about how positively awful we were around the opposite sex. We'd watch chick-flicks and laugh at the packs of lies they were feeding the masses.

  21. You should watch a few romantic comedies, Vivi--this has "pairing in the making" painted all over it. ;)

  22. When I was young my mum told me not to mistake romantic comedies for real life D:

  23. I like your mum.

    My dad always told me to take lessons from horror movies. Like "Don't be the annoying idiot who gets killed first."

    So I suppose some movies can be learnt from.

    Also, Fizz, we are watching the Ring tonight. Je n'aime pas le film romance-comedie!

  24. That's damn legit advice.

    My brother used to have a broken TV in his room. He watched the Ring. He moved it to the garage and didn't sleep for two days.